Category Archives: health

Grateful That Peace Surpasses All Understanding!

Five years and one month ago, I was ill and expected to die soon. Yet, obviously even today I am still very much alive and am expressing my gratitude for such through my postings to you on my gratitudesquared.com

Recently, and unfortunately, now I am facing uncertain illness again and am finding it hard to express gratitude in the face of my fear.

But, yesterday something happened to strengthen my resolve towards gratefulness, just in time to offset the strength of my growing fear as a multi-hour biopsy procedure approaches tomorrow.

In brief, I was engaging in a chat with a dear friend about health and wellness and she remarked that my parents and grandfather were with me in spirit at that time. This felt like a nice statement and I did not think much more about it at that time. About five minutes after, as I was driving alone in LA traffic, the phrase “peace that surpasses all understanding” came to mind. I rushed home to google the origin of this phrase because I had not heard that phrase for years, if at all. I could not remember, and certainly I do not speak like that. I should note, however, my father was a Baptist Minister, a relevant fact to this story I believe!

Thanks to my computer and Google, when I put that exact phrase in, I learned such interesting facts that I had to share with all of you. I learned that Paul the Apostle had written a letter to the Philippians (which is now known as the country of Greece) in which he instructed people to remain steadfast in their faith. Paul’s letter is the eleventh book of the New Testament, and Paul wrote it while in prison for preaching. Of course, I wondered what does this have to do with me and/or my health?

Those of you who know me know that I am very analytical, a researcher, and make decisions and take actions based on data, so I kept probing this phrase… My years of Ph.D. training were kicking in full blast. In brief, I just had to research this phrase, and learn the significance of such. This is what I am discovering even as I type this blog to you:

Paul wrote to the people In Philipi to express his GRATITUDE! Go to learnreligions.com for more information. It seems serendipitous that this verse is related to Gratitude! Out of all the verses in the Bible, this one emerged…
The Book of Philippians “conveys a powerful message about the secret of contentment… in every circumstance he had learned to be content“.
The main and consistent theme of this eleventh book is JOY! Joy and gratitude go hand in hand along one’s journey to a State of Gratitude. How wonderful…
The main message of Philippians 4 is encouragement. I felt I certainly needed that message to face the biopsy again after five years of no new tumors.
Important principles in Philippians 4 are peace and joy in all circumstances. Indeed, I was looking for peace of mind for the upcoming procedure. And, I must admit it is hard to find joy in the face of fear. This verse became my reminder.
My verse: Philippians 4:7 is “peace of God, which passeth all understanding shall keep your hearts and minds…” (KJV). See the relevance of this below.

Does anyone see the connections between this verse and my daily practices of Gratitude, joy, happiness, contentment? I do. I felt like I had received a message.

I wanted to learn more so I went to Pulpit Commentary on biblehub.com. Note: I am keeping this posting short so I will not explain verse 6 above my particular verse 7, but 6 is also relevant to my circumstance (“in nothing be anxious“).

Verse 4:7, as explained on biblehub, flows from God’s gracious presence. The “peace” passes ALL understanding. The peace “transcends the reach of human thought… it can be known only by the inner experience of the believer.” Further, “thoughts issue from the heart… in Hebrew Scriptures, the heart is regarded as the seat of the intellect, not of feeling only.” What a densely worded and impactful verse! I read it over and over again to gain a better understanding of that particular message.

So, how did this experience/verse appearing in my mind… impact me or manifest through my actions as I prepare myself mentally for the biopsy?

I am now at peace for tomorrow. Surprisingly…
Because I understand that the peace I now feel surpasses my understanding, and transcends beyond what my own human mind may comprehend, I am at peace. In fact, I now understand that this peace is so deep that I am unable to fully comprehend it – I must accept this peace through faith alone.
I am yielding my mind to my heart. My heart is in control now and tomorrow.
My intellect is given by faith to my heart. This is an interesting experience for me as I continually need to see the data and the evidence to trust, believe, and act.
The transcendent feeling I am experiencing today for tomorrow can be known only to me. This is such a true statement. As something like the following was said in the Nixon years, only when you have been in the deepest valley can you appreciate the experience on the mountaintops. I personally find that serious illness drives one to their faith to a greater extent than before, and when additional health issues re-emerge, only those experiencing the decision-making processes can know the depth of fear and sorrow or joy. Looking death in the face and making decisions to speed or prolong life is sobering at best and sacred overall.
For more than five years now I have explained my ongoing health to others as a consequence of not only doctors’ surgeries, traditional and alternative treatments, and a variety of life practices, but also due to God’s Grace and spiritual beliefs.
I typically say: “I can not explain why I am still alive.” “But, I do know that there is a spiritual component to my continued health”.

Yesterday, what happened to me while driving in the busiest of LA traffic was spiritual… again… It is a unique experience to experience…. it gave me joy, peace, hope, and understanding. It took my fear and anxiety away.

I am so grateful that I have peace that surpasses all understanding.

I hope I have adequately explained the meaning of the phrase that emerged in my mind yesterday………. through this posting. The meaning became clear, at least, to me. I know in reality that some of you will understand this posting fully as you have reached out to me with your own stories of life and death… Perhaps, in time, others will also come to understand… I pray most of you may never need to do so.

As I summarize this posting today, at least one person appeared to understand the significance of this phrase as well it seemed…

That is, one of my Jewish friends, read my post and listened to me calmly but joyfully relay my experience yesterday, after which she very simply and quietly said, “I might have to start reading the books of the New Testament”. I found this to be a significant statement, coming from a nonbeliever…

Blessings to you. My deepest and sincere gratitude I send to those of you who are holding me up with positivity and prayer! I thank you.

#gratitudeultra

Blessed At The Mission of Saint Agnes of Rome, Virgin and Martyr, in Solvang, California

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Recently, I visited the Mission in Solvang, CA, attending a Mass led by an Irish Priest, and experiencing the spiritual and social life of the Santa Ynez Valley. Through serendipity I received a blessing for my upcoming medical tests, as well as a blessing for a precious Bible purchased by a dear friend whose mother is nearing her end of life. The kind greetings from all of the staff at the Mission were most memorable as were the old fashioned gospel songs played through guitar by yet another priest. None of this was pre-planned which is why I am blogging, with gratitude, about my experience this day. It was a very special day!

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Grateful For Wisdom When Ending The Journey Of Life: An Overview

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I have always loved elderly people because they are wise and have wonderful stories to tell, if you listen. Unfortunately, we often get too busy during our own life’s journey to notice that older persons among us need more care from us. It is as though our journeys through life demand extra care when we begin our life, and again when we are nearing the end-of-life.

This posting includes my observations for you as a daughter, mom, friend, and health care professional regarding End-of-Life Care.

It is well known that people tend to like to stay at home as their journey through life comes to an end, but that is not always possible because of health issues, personal care needs, nutritional requirements, family distances, and so on. So, as we all age, the questions before us are: “What do we do?” “How do we plan for ourselves as we grower older and need extra care?”

Why am I posting this information for us today? Because I have watched my younger sister, my mom, and my dad pass away. Now I am watching dear friends and neighbors age, and I myself am growing older. As I was recently listening to Amanda Stead’s lecture on End-of-Life Care, I felt so grateful that Amanda reminded me, and helped me to summarize the wisdom we all have access to for our own planning:

We are all going to die at the end of our life journey, so how does one prepare for the best end of life? There are multiple resources to inform us about end-of-life care just as there is knowledge regarding beginning life, as in birth, parenting, etc.
As each of us, or our family members and friends age, it is important to learn about choices we each have regarding Hospice care, or Palliative care. Our choices do not need to be permanent as our health and care needs will change over time, but it is better to plan ahead and learn about such choices before being faced with an emergency.
As one ages there needs to be decisions regarding independence, dignity, spiritual preferences, psychological, emotional needs, ethical decisions, and personal wishes.
We all need to have people (family members or friends), who are our spokespeople in case we are unable to communicate clearly. We, or others, need to have an advanced directive (a written document) regarding our wishes for end-of life care.
We all need to discuss realistic outcomes as we anticipate what may be coming in our future. Thus, before you become ill or lose the ability to communicate, you need to talk about what you imagine to be a good plan for your End-of-Life. You might begin such conversations by answering the question: “What matters to me most at the end of life is ______________________________________?”
Sharing information is so important during this time. Information regarding your location preferences for where you wish to be as you grow older is important. Your financial costs, insurance coverage, wish for pain control, treatment preferences for eating, feeding, and swallowing should be identified.
Your personal wishes, and cultural values are important and necessary to understand and honor during this time period.
Reach out to Chaplains, Priests, Pastors, and Rabbis to incorporate your spiritual needs during these times of decision making.
Take care of the above types of decisions before you grow too old for such planning. Make sure you share your thoughts with your family and friends.
Know there is a “Dying Patient’s Bill of Rights”, and an abundance of resources provided through Medicare to assist you. Don’t put off till tomorrow what you should do today!

In the future, I plan to introduce a new “gratitude category” regarding end-of-life care as I am so grateful that information is available to me to provide for my dignity, spiritual, medical, psychological, and emotional needs as I grow older. In the context of generational differences in perception, as well as societal changes in our family constellations, it is more important than ever before to allow the elderly to prioritize their needs for independence as well as dependence on others.

I am grateful for knowledge regarding end-of-life care. How ’bout you?

For a spiritual perspective on End-Of-Life, let me conclude this blog with a poem written and read by my mother from her Book of Poetry titled, A House Inside of Me. The relevant poem for today is, I Don’t Want to Die I Like It Here. When you click on this link you will hear this poem. It seems relevant, in a more personal style of writing, to our topic today.

At this time in your life, What Matters Most to you for Planning? Please think about it as I am watching friends dealing and struggling with these issues right now.

#gratitudelite

Gratitude For Clarity Re: Tooth Pain Management

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Last week my tooth started to ache. I tried Acetaminophen then Ibuprofen tablets… a little relief. During the weekend the pain increased from a one to a ten… the earlier tablets provided no relief. My brother suggested I take an antibiotic in case I was developing an infection. I took only one pill … immediate relief!

On Monday, I went to a dentist who immediately sent me to an Endodontist. When that doctor asked which tooth? I reported that every tooth in my mouth and head and more seemed to be painful over the weekend, but one antibiotic pill seemed to give me immediate relief. He said, “that is the tell-tale sign of a bacterial infection!” He showed me an image similar to the one featured above.

See the tooth (in above image) marked with the ‘red’? You will also see the nerve from that single tooth goes to a main nerve branch and the consequence may be pain throughout your mouth, jaw, sinuses, eyes, head, and beyond! Wow… at that moment, I was so grateful for a new understanding and differentiation of tooth pain. The image looked like a skull with little worms climbing all over it. It reminded me of a horror film. I was stunned at the pain caused from one tooth to one nerve and all the branches from such. I get it!

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With Gratitude For The Grotto Of Lourdes, Bernadette, and Our Lady Mary, 11th February 1858 to 2022 On

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During the weekend of August 23, 2019, I had the opportunity to visit the Sanctuary of Lourdes in Lourdes France, where pilgrims and visitors, and the most vulnerable persons in our communities regularly have visited for 164 years, celebrating the apparitions of the Virgin Mary to the young girl, Bernadette (See the movie, The Song of Bernadette to learn the story). Today we celebrate this World Day of the Sick, as in 1993 Pope John Paul II established this Day at the Grotto where so many people find comfort and peace.

Please join me as we celebrate this Day each year on 11th February, with Gratitude.

Today Celebrate The World Day of the Sick, with Gratitude

#gratitudeultra

Grateful For The Benefits From Mental Practice

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Physically, we are constantly faced with the need to perform various physical actions such as walking, running, sitting, skating, biking, swimming, opening bottles, lifting and many more. As we grow older, or if we have any illness, sometimes our physical actions become limited, or modified. Too often I watch people become increasing disabled by their perception of their limitations.

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Interpretation When In A State of Gratitude

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Medicine is not a pure science like mathematics or physics. We learn this when getting second opinions from professionals because we want choices for our health care. When we get an initial diagnosis, we sometimes feel “frozen” and “scared”. It is at these moments of information exchange that I want to share some insights with you.

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Managing The Emotionality Of Gratitude

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Gratitude is an emotion. Poor health creates strong emotions and fears. Life and death decisions are emotional events in our lives. Yesterday, I experienced “life” once again after several weeks of believing I might be dying this time.

Back in 2017, without warning, I experienced breast, ovarian, and peritoneal cancers. I had multiple surgeries and treatments. Yesterday, we expected that I had lung cancer. I always say I am the sickest healthy person you might ever meet. Yet, for 4.5 years I have been blessed with good health and no recurrences. Yesterday, we decided my lung nodules will be followed… no invasive diagnostic procedures just yet. Yeah!

These past, but sudden events in my life drove me to “Gratitude”.

I am so grateful that I am alive and healthy, but I sometimes have survivor’s guilt as I know many people who have not been as fortunate as I, and have already lost their life.

So, I ask myself… how may I help? What might I say to you to cause you to be positive instead of scared to death, miserable, and so often in pain?

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Gratitude For Health

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Yesterday morning I felt fearful to visit a new doctor. As I drove to Santa Monica in the early morning hours, I found this artwork on the side of a building next to a Subaru car dealership in the Los Angeles area. I stopped and took a photo of “Gratitude” in a bed of roses. Seeing this art, I knew my fears were not warranted. I was gonna be OK.

Nearing the 4.5 year mark from several tumors, multiple surgeries and other health treatments, I was worried that my doctor referred me to a Pulmonologist to check out nodules in my lung after a recent CT scan. With the pandemic, of all the health issues I did not want to face, I was concerned about breathing, my lungs, and a painful biopsy during this particular time. Fortunately, I met a talented doctor who opted to watch the nodule as opposed to continue with an “invasive diagnosis” at this time. Oh Happy Day!

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I Am Grateful For My Spiritual Journey To Health And Wellness

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I am nearing four and one-half years of health after multiple cancers and surgeries in 2017. I am grateful that I am still healthy, but never do I take my present health for granted. The source stimulating these postings is my joy with life, and my sincere appreciation and happiness to have time to “pay it forward” to others while here.

As many people do, I read and ask questions, and share with others to learn about healing and health and wellness. I can tell you from experience that there is a lot to learn and practice to maintain health. Sometimes I stray from my devotion to a healthier lifestyle, better eating, mindful practices with toxins and GMOs in our world, and Western and Eastern medical beliefs. But, when my CT scans and labs remind me that my body chemistry is changing, I jump back into better practices and pray.

People ask me what am I doing to stay so healthy? I tell them what I am learning, but many people do the same things I do, and much more, and, sadly, many people continue to die around me which makes me so sad, and gives me a feeling of survivor’s guilt. I want to do more to help others so I keep posting happy ideas, and peaceful thoughts. Also, I post joyful events like playing with your pets, and enjoyable moments with family and friends or beautiful trips deep into nature.

This month I am pulling all of my postings, videos, blogs, tweets, and Instagrams into more of a common “digital media” composite so that I may share what I believe and what I have learned thus far. If this is helpful to you, please let me know. If you would like more from me, please let me know.

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